Breath… inhale… exhale..
Breath… inhale… exhale…
I am here. I am not there where my mind wants to be. It is hard to accept it but I’ve learned to move away from some unattainable desires. Learn to be at peace with the now. Enjoy your cup of coffee. Sit on the floor and play with your child. Do laundry with pride.
I’ve paid more attention to relaxing and having “me” time. I look forward to Wednesday nights to get in the bathtub, soak for a long time in hot/bubbly water and read a positive book with candlelight. I put a face and hair mask on, shave, moisturize and massage every part of my body with no rush. I keep reading my book and go to bed as early as I can. Wine? Tea? Perfect!
I read something that got me thinking, it said: “What would a person say of what your priorities are in life if that person is looking at your actions and not listening to your words?” Wow! Mine would be: work, family and personal development. What are yours? Are you acting in a different way than you want to be? Or are you being too hard on yourself and you realize that you are doing what you want to do and believed you have not for a long time?
I’ve avoided therapy for many years. Who has time for that? Well, now we all do. I finally said to a close good friend who provides online therapy that I wanted to start my sessions. It’s been many weeks now: I’ve cried, I’ve felt, I’ve forgiven, I’ve learned. I’m still learning. I’m still forgiving. I have this sensation of tranquillity and peace inside of me, every day, after 15 years. Not all day every day, but every single day.
Saying Yes and No
It all depends. I found myself saying yes too much when I desire to watch TV. Well, I’ve learnt to say no when I think it’s been enough and find something else to do. Other times, I’ve said no too much to myself when I wanted to buy junk food because is unhealthy, for example. Well, I’ve learnt to say yes to some cravings here and there.
Substitutes are a blessing
I’ve learnt to appreciate options and extras on my day to day. If the coffee runs out, I drink tea. No more white rice? I cook brown rice. This has also help me use things from my pantry that I could have never touched before.
Be ok with a messy house
Sometimes I don’t feel like cleaning and that does not mean that I am a bad mom or a lazy person. I’ve learned to be ok with a messy kitchen and a pile of laundry. Life is not a competition. No one is going to come to my house to give me the medal for “The cleanest house of the city” award. I prefer to go out and play with my son and then I’ll clean when the time comes.
Not everything around us is a bummer. Learn to view things with a smile and pay attention to the positive instead of the negative. It doesn’t mean that you have to fool yourself about what is going on elsewhere. Be honest, kind and OK with the present. You can do it, I know you can.